The Theme (or “The Bride Who Never Wanted to be a Bride”)

A rather long post by Jaime

First of all, before anyone starts thinking that I am doing this against my will, allow me to clarify on the title of this post: have I always wanted to get married?  Yes, absolutely.  Have I always wanted a wedding?  Not until recently, and now that I do it’s not at all for the reasons I thought I would.

Now allow me to clarify my clarification: when I was a little girl I played the same games that most little girls play.  I played house and I played Barbies and so on.  But I guess I played these games with a twist.  Because despite the fact that I owned a bridal Barbie (actually I think it was Wedding Day Midge – she had reddish hair) and she was my favourite doll, her poor wedding dress just never got much use after I pulled her out of the box.  Midge was married, sure, and Ken was a wonderful husband, but their wedding itself was some distant hazy concept that likely involved a simple, private ceremony at a sweet little church house residing somewhere in their memories.  To me, the best part of the game was once they were settled down in their super-mansion and Barbie/Midge was about to take off again on one of her world tours as a rock star or a ballerina or a rock-star ballerina.  Ken would come along for the trip to cheer her on and be her manager.  They lived an exciting, adventure-filled life and thought little about their wedding day because in the grand scheme of things it was today that counted.  (On a side note – my version of house was much the same, only with children who would be left at home with a babysitter while my husband and I went out on the town.  But that’s another story about fit-ness to parent for a whole other type of blog entirely…).

I should also explain that I am just a tad bit high strung.  Like, I once had a full blown panic attack over a meatball sub kind of high strung.  So the very thought of a year or more engagement wherein everyone I knew would be pressuring me or bombarding me with questions, followed up by a day of these same people staring at me and judging me…well let’s just say that it was less than appealing.  And never having thought much about wanting a wedding period let alone what kind of wedding I wanted was enough to cause many sleepless nights within the first week of getting engaged.  I wanted to be married, but the getting married part was going to be tricky.

Enter Mary.  By some magical chance as I was scouring the internet in a failed attempt to reduce my freak-outs/day ratio, I stumbled upon a wedding planner.  For a girl like me, this is a dream come true.  An opportunity to let someone else do the legwork for what amounts to no additional cost (due to the terrific “Wedding Girl” pricing many suppliers offer) so that we can relax and enjoy our engagement.  I can make a decision, often very quickly, between a couple of options…but ask me to decide amongst the literally thousands of options out there and my inclination is to curl up into a fetal position and hide under the covers for the next 12-14 months.

But a wedding was a must.  Even if we decided to keep it to family only (which we more or less did) we were still looking at between 60 and 80 guests.  The more we talked to people the more we realized that rather than wanting to have a day that would be all about us, which is not a high priority to either Chris or myself, the reason for putting on this large event is that the people we love really want to share in our happiness.  And how could we deny them?

So okay.  Let’s do this.

As it turns out, even wedding planners have questions about your “vision” for the day.  At this point I had done enough pinterest surfing that I had a pretty solid idea that our wedding was going to be 3 things: 1) upscale rustic 2) in the summer or early fall and 3) featuring corals and peaches as a colour scheme.  So how did we end up with a wedding that is 1) vintage glam 2) on December 1st and 3) all things glittering and gold/silver?

Reason #1: The dress.

In true “Type A” fashion I decided to grab a friend and do some pre-dress-shopping dress shopping.  So by the time I took my parents with me to a bridal store I already had a sweet little lightweight country-looking dress picked out.  Perfect.

Until dad (aka “Glenn-Baby” or GB) stepped in.  My entire life my father has been the one to pick out any outfit I have worn for any important event.  6th-grade graduation?  Dad found that one.  8th grade grad?  Also dad.  The same went for university graduation – 100% GB approved.  But when he pulled a dress from the sea of whites and off-whites and ivories my first reaction was, “No way.  Not that one.  Don’t even want to try it on, thanks.”

And when he finally convinced me to humour him, I was amazed.  I felt like a grown up in this dress.  It was stunning.  And glamourous.  And not at all rustic or country or summer.

Now what?

Reason #2: The Venue

Chris already posted all about the NOTL courthouse, so I’ll spare any rehashing of the details, but needless to say this location was also not rustic or country, and given the fact that it houses the Shaw festival through the summer and early fall and is therefore only available through the winter months, there went my thoughts on a wedding date.  The good news?  It was the perfect location for the dress I was almost certain at this point was going to be the one.  The combination of dress and venue set the stage for the ideal elegant, glamourous event.  But as for the corals and peaches?  Those were out the window as well since the reception area is decidedly pink.

So here we are today with a wedding theme that is, as mentioned above, both elegant and glamourous.  Our colours are largely neutrals to allow the wall colours of the venue to shine, but I am determined to add a touch of glitter since…well I love all things that sparkle and shine and having a holiday wedding is a great excuse to do this tastefully!  Somewhere along the way I got my heart set on white poinsettias, so expect to see them in the wedding pics as well!

It’s not what I thought I wanted for our wedding, but let’s face it – a wedding wasn’t even what I thought I wanted anyway.  In the end, my goal (and I think Chris’) for the day is to be married.  With the help of Mary, we hope that it will be a tastefully coordinated event with lots of great food and laughs, and an opportunity to show our appreciation to all of the wonderful folks who have supported us and given us some very good advice along the way.  As with most things we fear, the process has not been nearly as scary as I imagined.  I’m actually looking forward to the big day, and then to a lifetime of adventures with my very best friend in the whole world.

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4 thoughts on “The Theme (or “The Bride Who Never Wanted to be a Bride”)

  1. It never stays what you think it will be! I was trying to plan a destination wedding for months. Then I gave up and my husband picked our venue (sight unseen from me) – a sugar shack in Quebec. If you’d asked me to guess THAT, I’d still be guessing. Anyway, your revised wedding scheme sounds lovely, can’t wait for photos.

    • haha I guess everything does sort of come as a surprise, mostly because from what I hear everyone picks a completely different dress then they thought they would (I’m still a wee bit sad that I won’t be able to sit down in a big pile of poofy skirts). Glad it passes designer Lesley’s approval though. You have lovely taste, so I can’t be too far off classy if you think it’s good!

  2. That’s true! I wanted an autumn wedding…then becoming a teacher made that less easy and desirable. Summer wedding it was! Changes in situations can change everything!

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